Erring Out

Well once again I feel a need to put some more private thoughts out there, not necessarily for any one else to read but hopefully as a means for self improvement/healing. It was conveyed to me some time ago that in conversation between two of my relatives that I became the topic of conversation. During this conversation one person said to the other you know I love him but he is lazy. When this was relayed to me my first reaction was how dare they I have always held a good job never been fired from a job, etc. etc. All of that indignant self defense crap. The typical I am better than though B.S. After settling down and giving it some long hard thought I came to the realization that the person speaking knew me better than I knew myself. My life has been me giving up when the going got tough. If it was not easy for me, or not on my terms, I quit. I could go on and on about this but it started when I was very young and continues even today. The things I claim that are or were important to me if I had to actually work for them I quit. I realize now that what I thought was hard work was no such thing because I was doing what I enjoyed, and when doing what you enjoy the most strenuous physical work is as they say a labor of love. I can't change the past even if I wanted to, I do however have it in my capacity to alter the future. I intend to do just that, perfection, probably not, my best effort, with God's help and a better focus, I hope so. I have in the past found my self feeling sorry for myself because of what I have accomplished so far in life. I may not have accomplished what I had envisioned for myself, I may not have the education I had envisioned, but I can do what I wanted to do when I was younger. What I envisioned when I was younger was to help people, to assist them in feeling better. I can still do just that, not necessarily with the same capacity as my younger vision, but in some capacity. I am not sure how, as I sit here I am going to accomplish that goal, but with some thought on the subject I am sure I will figure it out. Enough for now, as always I will report back when I feel a need, or actually have something to say or report. Bye for now!

New Year

Well here it is 2009 already. The first weekend of the year was a busy one spent out of town. My cousin Lyndsay got married on Friday the 2nd and we celebrated Christmas with Carrie, Abby and Matt on Saturday. I am posting a couple of pictures in case you are interested, the middle two pics are from the wedding and the top and bottom pics are from Christmas in January. The wedding was very nice and we had fun at the reception being entertained by Melissa, that's her in the red blouse above. She was dancing with all of the small kids and when she tired them out she danced solo. As always it was a blessing seeing Abby, oh yeah it was fun seeing Carrie and Matt also. Abby just simply makes me smile she is the cutest little girl, she loved to pass out the presents and also had a great time opening them. It is fairly difficult keeping this page current after spending all day on the computer at work I really don't feel like getting on at home. I was off work part of the day yesterday and all day today, I had a gout flare up over the weekend and it is still really painful today. I have been taking pain med's and also the gout preventative but from what I have read the preventative is not affective after an attack has taken place. Hopefully it will be better in the morning and I will be able to get back to work. I received a new Wii game for Christmas and it has been consuming a lot of my time, it is a Lego game Indiana Jones. It is not the typical game when you think of Wii, it is a sit on your butt and play more like the older video games. Well Faye just walked in from work and I have supper on so I will attach the pictures and sign off for now. Happy New Year to all, and I am praying for a better year for all.